on one hand cliche romantic shit irritates me but on another hand it’s like i want someone to fall in love with the way i laugh and knock on my window in the middle of the night to take me outside to look at the stars or go somewhere like i don’t care where it could be fucking walmart or burger king i don’t even care speaking of hands someone hold my hand just hold my fucking hand
- 1: My daughter had an imaginary friend named Sally, she told me once about how Sally was in jail for chopping her mom’s head off….
- 2: My daughter when we were home alone one night, “mommy, who’s that man on the ceiling?”
- 3: “The shadow man keeps talking to me at my window.”
- 4: I was reading a story to my daughter when she suddenly slammed it shut, point to the empty doorway, and screamed “you get out of here! You’ve killed enough people!”
- 5: “I need to get my hands on a giant penis so I can put this fire out all the way!”
- 6: “Daddy, when can we get rid of that kid hanging in my closet?” I asked her what she was talking about and she told me all about a teenage boy who was hanging by a belt around his neck in her closet. I went to her closet there was nothing there, and she said he only is there when I’m not around.
- 7: “There are three dead kids buried in our back yard. They told me where we can find them.”
- 8: My five year old son once looked up at me while we were watching a movie and said, “I think I remember coming out of your no-no.”
- 9: “Mommy, there’s a kid covered in blood in my bedroom and he won’t go away.”
- 10: My 4yo shook me awake one night and asked if she could sleep with me because tonight the old woman at the window was being mean for some reason.
- 11: An 8 year old I used to teach had a hard time with eye contact and appropriate touch. He looked me straight in the eyes one morning, not missing a beat, and told me, “you know, I think you’d look a lot better if you were dead in my basement.”
- 12: “Mom, why is that lady from the cemetery sitting in my room?”
Hey remember when Harry and Ron didn’t see any conceivable issues with just flying an illegally enchanted car to their school, at the age of 12 no less, because they missed the train
Sometimes the James in him just comes right out and smacks you full force in the face doesn’t it